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😅 Um, so yea. I temporarily forgot about my blog. Haha, whoops.
In my defense stuff was going on, like my medication giving my depressive episodes and lots of family visits.
Since the new year, I still have the eating disorder, my periods came back and I hate them but low key am happy, and I’m job hunting. If I have to work with my family one more summer I’m going to go insane.
I had a wonderful Christmas and nice News Years spent playing ESO. I’ve lived alone for so long I rather enjoyed having News Years all to myself. As much as I love my family I’m not that festive of a person so I prefer to be alone on holidays. I didn’t even buy a Christmas scented candle or play any holiday music. I swear I do enjoy the holidays but my participation in them in near non-existent.
In an effort to combat the eating disorder, I’m started getting into fitness a little more. So far so good, I’ve been able to eat somewhat more regularly however I’m making super low-cal meals. So like yea, three meals a day! All about ~300 cals each. That still counts as progress right, I ask knowing full well that today I have no plans for eating if I don’t exercise.
I applied to work at a gym.
Maybe seeing people take control of their health in a positive manner will encourage me to do the same. Or back fire horrendously. At this point I don’t care I just want a paycheck. Family drama over the holidays has led me to seriously considering living in my car just to get away from them.
I totally would too if I didn’t have Clar and Dexter. As it stands, I’m looking at getting a little camper, buying a used truck, and moving to Portland. Great in theory if I had a job. While still technically employed on the farm,
- I’m going to go insane and probably irreparably damage my relationship with my Fubi’s side if I’m forced to be around him or his wife one more summer.
- I can’t save up any money if I’m only being paid once a month for three months and then not doing anything the rest of the year. Farm life sucks in the financial department.
- The hours and family drama cause too much stress and triggered the eating disorder to level it’s at now. I don’t want to know what another year will do to me.
So I’m on the hunt for a new job. I’ve been at it since the start of the month. So far there’s a lot of places hiring, been rejected for one, got an interview at another yesterday( & haven’t heard back 😭), and spent most of my morning filling out applications today. At some point someone is bound to hire me, right?
In more positive news, my Etsy shop had exactly 3 sales this holiday season. And I got a 5 star review 😄. At least I do good at events. My goal this year is too attend more events because at least at them I have decent sales. Online it really kinda sucks but at least I now officially have a review and some sales under my belt.
I got two new molds this year so I’m able to diversify the style of necklace I sell and I’m looking at getting a bit more rustic( I guess that’s the right term?) with the dream catchers. The problem is if everyone is unique then no one in unique, I’m just hoping I can stand out out enough to make at least one sell a month. Anywho, hello people. I’m going to attempt regular posting again 😙.
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